I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
