Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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