Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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