I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
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