She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
