i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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