it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
