batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
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