I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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