What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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