Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize