Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
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Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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