I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
