You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
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