He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I wear drunk well.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
