so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize