I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I just had sex on a roof
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
