at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
