If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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