Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
