So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
