I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
