its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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