I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
