I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
