Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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