I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Can Purell be used as lube?
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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