you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
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