it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
