a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Operation Purity has been aborted
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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