He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
