just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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