White coat. Heels.
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize