Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Just high enough for therapy.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
