Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize