oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Randomize