At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I'm way too hungover for life right now
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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