Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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