Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize