you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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