I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
my nose is crying tears of wow.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
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