apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
