How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize