why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
it was like having sex with a tree stump
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
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