your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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