Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
