so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
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