It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
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and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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