Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
