You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
