At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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