DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.